Category Archives: runner
So listen guys, Running and I may have gotten back together. I know, I know. It was a short break. But I thought about it a lot. And we are going to take things slow this time. Not dive into it like last time and tell ourselves that 6 to 8 miles at a fast clip every single day is good for us.
Running and I have talked about it, and we’re going to keep things casual for a while. I think I’m still going to do other activities, and we’ll just spend a little time together every week. It will be kind of like when you break up with your boyfriend but miss him terribly because you know you can be so good together, so you decide that you guys will still talk sometimes and just meet up for coffee and maybe dinner, until you have it all figured out. Keep it friendly and without commitment, you know? (I need to stop comparing running to boyfriends and actually start dating, I think, because this is getting ridiculous.)
But instead of coffee (which I miss terribly right now because I am trying to give it up for a whole week!), we are doing short jogs a few times per week. Wednesday I did 20 minutes on the treadmill, and today I did 23. This weekend, if I’m really feeling it, I might take Running out for a spin by the lake. But an easy spin. I’m running when I feel like it and not forcing myself to do it when my shins are screaming or I’m drained after a long day at work. Because I believe that with Running, as with any other good relationship, my heart should actually be in it.
I don’t know how to say this but… I think we need to take a break. I know what you’re thinking, by ‘break’ I mean that it’s over, right? No, no, no, please. Let me reassure you that this is not what I mean at all. Because I love you, I really do. Our history is a long and complicated one, but one with more happiness than sadness, and I am just not willing to give you up.
But we still need to take a break. You say you’ll try harder because you want to make this work. I say we’ve been trying, and I’m getting more and more frustrated. You say you didn’t realize how bad the problem was getting. And I say, how could you not? My runs have dwindled to maybe once a week, and I haven’t had a good run outside since St. Patrick’s Day. The thing is, we both saw this coming, and we were both just waiting for the other to say something. You, dragging my feet when I try to break into a trot. Me, resisting your allure when you call to me on beautiful spring days from the lakefront trail just two blocks from my apartment.
In fact, I have a confession to make. You’ve been so hard on me and my shins and my ego lately that, well, I’ve been driven into the arms of another. I know I’ve always been faithful to you, but I just needed some time away and the elliptical understood me! You know, I really don’t like it much, and I don’t really know how much it’s doing for me, but it doesn’t hurt me. Probably won’t be too upset when I break things off and dash back to you, either. It’s like that cute boy I had a thing with a few summers ago, who I didn’t really have any interest in, but who didn’t really give me any grief either. The elliptical may just sit there and look pretty and not contribute at ALL while I do my thing and mindlessly burn calories, but it doesn’t cause me the pain that you have over the last few months.
And Running, sweetheart, the pain is not just physical. So my hormones went crazy and living through a winter in Chicago made my frame a little heavier. Is that any reason to slow my pace down by the amount that you did? Of course I can still run — it’s not like I’m carrying around an extra person or anything — but did you have to make me feel like I had never been a runner ever before in my life? Did you have to take my 7:30 pace away from me, and hand me a 9-minute mile on a good day, even through months of work? You make me feel lazy and like there is something wrong with me. I know you don’t mean to, but you hurt me psychologically and emotionally. Lately, I’ve caught you checking out other girls (and even guys!), and you’ve been sending signals that tell me you don’t think I’m a ‘runner’ anymore.
So, again, we need to take a break. Like I said, I love you, but I think some time apart would do us both some good. You go wild on the bike path next to Lakeshore drive. Have a ball down by North Avenue Beach. And I will enjoy the company of my trusty ten speed (once the tires are blown back up) and of the pool and the weights at the gym. We’ll go out and see other people (activities?), and we will eventually realize how much we miss one another. I’ll still wear your shoes and think of you fondly, and you’ll make someone else pick up their pace when a really great/horrible pop song comes on. You’ll miss my dedication to you, and I’ll miss how badass I feel after finishing a ten miler and how hot my legs look in a dress. Don’t roll your eyes at me, you know my vanity is endearing.
Keep in touch, with all my heart, xoxo, etc, etc,